Nov. 19, 2021

My Lifelong and Ever Evolving Relationships With Shadow People

My Lifelong and Ever Evolving Relationships With Shadow People

For as far back as I can remember, shadow people have been a part of my life. My earliest memories of having convulsions and seizures either randomly or due to extremely high fevers also include these entities. These are my first memories of them. I was six years old and laying on the couch after a particularly bad convulsion with a fever that should’ve left me rendered unconscious or dead at almost 104 degrees fahrenheit. I would hallucinate because of it and I remember so vividly as I lay there on the couch talking nonsense to my dad who was trying to cool me down with ice and a cold rag, (it was the 80’s so I guess you didn’t have to take your children to the hospital if you didn’t want to.) strange and scary figures stepped into the room.

Even at that age I knew the difference between what I was hallucinating and what was real, at least after the fact. These figures seemed to step right out of the wall. It was nighttime and dark in the room as the light would only make me hotter and more sick. There was a really tall one, a male as best as I can tell simply by his form and honestly, my intuition. He was wearing a hat and had glowing red eyes. Though he had no facial features and there was no expression to be seen, I somehow knew he had an evil grin. To his left was a much shorter figure, it didn’t look like a person but had the shadowy outline of an animal. Nothing I had ever seen before or since but it was definitely a “pet” or “minion” of the taller man with the hat. It was snarling. Apparently all of this, the sights and sounds, were only visible and audible to me as my dad, though seeing the terror in my eyes, acknowledged it only to tell me to close my eyes and try to sleep and that it would all be ok in the morning.

My Irish Catholic father, bless his heart, still to this day refuses to accept my psychic abilities and believes anything having to do with Spirit, whether good or bad is evil and “mumbo jumbo”. Anyways, back to the shadow entities. The person to the left of the hat man was a female. Again she had no particular or specific form but I just knew from the energy she gave off she was a woman, or at least that’s what she was projecting to me. I don’t technically think any shadow people are male or female because those are human labels and none of them are human, nor have they ever been. All three of these figures stepped right out of the wall, out of the shadows and darkness of the night and all three were lusting after my sickness. They wanted to feed off of my weakness and pain but even more than that, they wanted to taste my terror.

They stayed where they were, just staring at me. The animal thing growling and snorting. Making gross sounds that somehow made me want to puke even more. These things were affecting me. My dad finally decided my fever had gone down enough and asked if I wanted to stay on the couch or sleep in his room. I chose his room, hoping these beings wouldn’t be able to get to me if my dad was there. It seems I was right, too, as once he picked me up and carried me out the living room, I looked back and all three had slipped once more into the shadows of the room. I went to sleep and woke up the next day feeling physically much better but an emotional wreck as I somehow just knew what I had seen the night before hadn’t been the figment of the high fever but very real. I hoped and prayed I wouldn’t encounter them again but those prayers, unfortunately, weren’t answered.

These three figures have shown up throughout my life, since that first night so long ago in 1989 that I’ve lost count. They don’t only show up when I’m sick anymore either as it was just a month later that I saw them again. I was playing in my room with my dolls when suddenly I felt all of the hairs on my body stand up and a cold chill enter the room. Now, as a psychically gifted child I immediately knew this feeling, only at that point in time I related it to Spirit. I thought I was about to have a visitation from the other side. In a way I was right, I guess, but it wasn’ t the kind I had come to know and was expecting. I looked up from my dolls into my dimly lit room and there the three entities were again, standing in the corner by my bedroom closet. Only one of them had eyes that I could see. The “pet” thing and the woman were simply silhouettes and for me that was terrifying enough. I asked them what they wanted but of course I got no answer. Not out loud anyways. I didn’t realize until I was much older and much more advanced with my abilities that I had received an answer that night and always received one whenever I would ask them things.

You see, the response was telepathic. In my head so as to confuse me and make me think these thoughts were my own. I suddenly thought, “why don’t I go to bed? It’s nighttime after all and I’m so very tired.” I laid down and fell fast asleep, even with these entities standing there and watching me. That in and of itself was strange enough. I would wake up constantly in a state of what we now call “sleep paralysis.” Feeling as though I couldn’t speak or move or scream out for my dad. I couldn’t breathe most of the time and it was absolutely terrifying. I would try to fight but of course it was in vain. I could see it was the woman who would hold me down while the man stood next to the bed and leaned over me, peering into my eyes and not letting me shut them. The pet would be next to me on my bed as if it were my own domestic animal and I could feel it’s foul breath on my face. I couldn’t turn away. I was completely helpless and at their mercy. I could hear their thoughts though. Eventually I would just pass back out. Things like this would happen a lot to me and eventually I became introverted and weird. I couldn’t tell anyone what was happening.

My dad would never believe me and the other kids would make fun of me. Fast forward to when I was about 22 years old and living on my own. By this time I had had hundreds of nights like the one I just described but this is when I finally started researching what exactly I was dealing with. There wasn’t much of a world wide web in 2002. It was all in its infancy. I would go to the library and look the old fashioned way but still didn’t find much help. It’s at this point when I decided to ask my spirit guides to help me or at least explain what these things are and what they want. I was told I’m not allowed to know what they are, only that they come from a place that is “other” but that I should always remember that telepathy can go both ways.

I decided to put this thought into action. The next time they visited I asked them what they wanted using my mind. This of course wasn’t while I was under any kind of attack. They didn’t just come for that. They came just to lurk and stare and strike the fear of God into me, or so it seemed. By this time I had three children and noticed when I was pregnant, each time I received more visits than normal and was starting to wonder if my kids could see them as well. Especially my oldest. It turns out, he could. That’s another story altogether though. Maybe for another time.

I would sit and have conversations with these beings. I would ask questions and they would usually answer. Is it so strange that after all of this I started to consider these shadow entities, the dead I communicated with on a regular basis and my guides my only friends? They told me, over time of course, that they were from another place and time. They explained that they were there for my energy. I asked them why they seemed so evil and they said it’s only because they would be considered “evil” as humans perceive evil to be BUT that they really weren’t and that I was simply helping them out. They explained that the shadow is the only form they are able to take on while in this realm or on this planet. It was all bull of course but once I started having these long conversations with them, I found they were attacking me on a significantly less regular basis. I’ll spare you the repetitive and somewhat monotonous details of all of their visits from this point until now and tell you about my more recent experiences.

You see, it’s 2021 as I sit and write this and I still get almost nightly visits from these same three entities. The only time I went more than a month without a visit was when, in 2016, I was baptized Christian and reborn. I also saw a healer that same week who told me to call out in the name of the Lord when I experienced these “sleep paralysis episodes” and they would be forced to leave me alone and stop. It actually works. I somehow summon the inner strength to say the Lord’s prayer, even if I can just recite it in my head, and they back off. They still come and lurk. They like to lurk over my 3 and a half year old son. He is also sensitive but somehow doesn’t seem to see these particular entities. Makes sense to me as they explained they were “assigned to” me and not for others to witness. I no longer engage them and in fact I pretend most of the time like they aren’t there. But I see them.

When I am reading oracle cards for friends and clients. When I’m meditating or channeling. When I wake up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I walk right past them as though they aren’t there. It’s been about 32 years now of experiencing these shadow beings and I still have no idea if anything they told me is true or not. I am very much of the opinion that they are demonic in nature, possibly Djinn and that the “pet” is in fact some sort of hell hound. They are definitely lower vibrational. I’m hoping one day to write a book to let the world know about my encounters and conversations with these beings who claim to only come from a place that is “other.” I am much stronger in my faith these days and have fully embraced my psychic self. I have seen other shadow entities or “shadow people” as they’re more commonly called. In fact I see at least one and almost every single day. They come and they go and I go on pretending as though I don’t see them. I put up protection charms and little spells to keep all evil and negative entities and energies away from me and my family and it definitely works.

Somehow though, these shadow beings are still able to come and go as they please and they are definitely connected to me and not the property my house is on or anyone else here. Nobody else sees them but I wonder sometimes if they have influence over other people who come to my house. Especially over my husband who lives in it as the significant and negative changes in his behavior and attitude since I met him are alarming. I am currently working on finding out more about that. I could go on and on and in fact I think one day I will, in a book or series of them regarding these three who I call “the family” and all of the terror they’ve provided throughout my life. The main thing one could take away here is that, whether religious or spiritual or not, the Lord’s prayer or any prayer to Him WILL make them stop their physical and psychic attacks, in the moment at least.

I hope one day I will wake up and the heaviness in my soul that these beings seem to be the cause of is lifted and I’ll immediately know they’re no longer with me. I’m not so sure at this point though if that will be a huge comfort or a major disappointment as I still don’t know much about them. They know everything about me and at times have even alerted me to things about to happen to help me to avoid them. This is what evil does though. It throws you a bone every once in a while so it can say, “look at how helpful I am. You should definitely trust me.” Don’t do it folks! I know many people have told me that they had infestations of shadow people and were able to get rid of them by doing this or trying that. That’s awesome! It won’t work for me though. These things are attached to me and have been since as long as I can remember. Like, a part of my extended family. I would much rather deal with spirits and the dead- even the ones who come to me looking grisly and horrific. I can easily interpret their intentions. Many people also think that shadow people are time travelers. Maybe they are, but I for one would hate and be terrified even more to envision a point in time in the future of this world where these things roam freely and possibly even have dominion. That’s all I have for you today, stay tuned for more as my conversations continue and my research grows. 


Gemma Jade


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